Can You Hear Me Now? The Hallway Conference Call

The Bathroom Summit: 90s LG phones and High-Volume Networking

If you need a reason to smile today, let me introduce you to the latest corporate power play happening in my living room. Or rather, my hallway.

Over the weekend, we hit up a few yard sales, and a sweet neighbor gave my three-year-old and five-year-old a couple of relics from the ancient past: those old 90s LG cell phones with the slide-out keyboards. You know the ones—indestructible bricks that could probably survive a nuclear blast. The boys were absolutely thrilled with their new "tech."

Later that evening, I was upstairs grabbing something when a wall of sound hit me.

It wasn't an argument (thank goodness—no Minecraft swords were involved this time). It was just a very, very loud conversation. They were screaming at the top of their lungs, but the tone was completely casual. Intrigued, and slightly worried about the lack of "inside voices," I crept back downstairs to investigate the noise.

Here is the exact layout of the corporate conference call I walked into:

• Executive #1 (The 3-Year-Old): Sitting comfortably on the toilet, mid-poop, holding a LG to his ear.

• Executive #2 (The 5-Year-Old): Hiding behind his bed in his bedroom directly across the hall, also holding a LG to his ear.

The reason for the ear-splitting volume? They were "talking on the phone," and since the 1999 LG network currently has zero bars in our house, yelling was the only logical way to ensure the signal reached across the hallway.

I absolutely died laughing. I couldn’t even bring myself to tell them to hush, because honestly, the logistics made perfect sense in their little minds.

I couldn't tell you what the high-stakes business meeting was actually about, but the visual of a toddler negotiating a deal from the porcelain throne via a slide-out keyboard is a core memory I’m tucking away forever. Naturally, the meeting adjourned after about four minutes when they both got distracted and moved on to the next chaotic game they invented.

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Closing Thought: Who needs an iPhone 15 when you have a 1998 brick and a bathroom across the hall? Kids will turn literally anything into a comedy routine.

What is the funniest "made-up game" your kids have ever played with something that wasn’t actually a toy? Let’s laugh together in the comments!